Monday, March 27, 2017

2000 ka chutta hai?

Are you still struggling to find change for this piece of currency that looks like monopoly Martian dollar from the movie 'Total Recall' (the Arnie version, if you please!)? Then welcome aboard the journey called, "Life after demonetization is awesome". By the way, that was pun intended, point obscured. And for those bhakhts who didn't get the joke, here's the straight line: Life still sucks post demonetization, especially if you are looking for chutta for INR 2000. Get it!

The other day, I booked Uber using cash option, because guess what, finally I was able to draw some money from a functional ATM, which however, only dispensed 2000 rupee notes. So, if you only had 1000 in your account and desperately needed money, the ATM just showed you, well you know what. I mean your aaukad, and what were you thinking?

So after that funny digression, let's come down to the main mudda. I thought in my naivety that this guy would have chutta, and didn't choose the option to pay through PayTM. However, mayhem began once I reached the destination - the upmarket and swanky Cyber Hub. I mean, dude, what have you done to yourself. You look fab. The last time I saw you, you were a barren dessert. Now, you look damn sexy. Nah, I am not referring to anyone with the Adam's apple stuck in his throat, I am talking about Cyber Hub! 

Post another funny digression, let's focus on my desperation to find chutta. The driver didn't have any, and there wasn't really a nukkar dukaan that would have given me any change. And let's face it, 2000 ka chutta kaunsa dukandar deta hai yaar. So, I started my expedition to find some working ATM. Oh! Yes, that's an expedition dear, because none of the three machines that were 'displayed' in a row worked. If this goes on for a few more months, we could actually put the ATMs on display at National Museum with the descriptor - "This is an Automated Teller Machine, popularly called ATM, that once dispensed money."

There you go, another funny digression. After unsuccessfully punching, pin number mind you, at another 'dead' ATM, I finally gave up. I decided to take the 'dukandar' route, only this time, it was to a trip to the Cafe Coffee Day. As I told the guy at the counter to give me a cold coffee and waved the 2000 rupee note, he, I kid you not, opened the empty drawer and showed me that he doesn't have even a single note! He has just opened the cafe. He directed me to another cafe, and it was the same story there as well. Just when I was about to make an embarrassing call to the client for chutta, I was saved by an immensely sweet cold coffee at a hangout that had teenagers! I am still wondering what were they doing at a corporate hub that only had office-goers with patta around their necks. Sorry, guys couldn't help the pun. 

As I handed the chutta to the harassed driver, who by now thought that madam must have run away with his hard-earned money, I breathed a sigh of relief, and finally proceeded for the meeting at [Social], a very bad choice for a co-working space, unless you just want to hangout in a pub and drink using the money of your investors!

No comments:

Post a Comment