Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Brutally honest reviews of top networking apps by an annoyingly opinionated single woman!

That's me. Annoyingly opinionated. And, yes, single too :p

All the single men and women out there would identify with this. When you are single, networking apps become your lifeline, it kind of gives you hope that all is not 'lost' in the world after all!

So, here's reviewing some such apps in a brutally honest manner, laced with dollops of sarcasm. If you are easily offended, do read this now!

Facebook makes us depressive and then demonic - Of course we feel crushed every time we see those cute little babies or lovey dovey couples on their honeymoon. What do you think we are, emotionless robots? But hold it, we also carefully plan our revenge. We display our awesomeness with our cool swag and sexy profile pics, that amazing solo trip we undertook, weekend hangouts and parties, and an unashamedly blatant showcase of everything and anything new. Oh! Yes, it's all planned baby!

Twitter is our external brain - We have an inherent need to be re-assured that we are intelligent and because that 'significant other' is missing whom we could have bored with our non-stop fascinating chatter, we turn to Twitter, or get turned on by Twitter. Hey, isn't Twitter kind of sapiosexual! Now, we rattle our brains to come up with something funny or interesting or pensive in 140 characters, editing and re-editing our thoughts to the extent that we don't stop unless we shout 'Eureka' unlike Archimedes (difference being we don't run like him dude!).

We use WhatsApp for work - That's actually the truth. Either we are using it for coordinating with our clients, boss, colleagues during the day or lamenting about our sad lives with our few still-there-to-give-us-their-shoulders-friends at night. And, if you catch us at the dead of the night on this app, well, that's because we are either snooping on our exes, or checking out our crushes, or simply trying to mute that conversation the American chachi is having with the Canadian moushi on home remedies for curing loosies!

We are the 'inventors' of hashtags on Insta - We squeeze out our creativity on Instagram just as we squeeze the toothpaste tube when it is at its fag end! Because we have a smartphone and we think ourselves no less than a Raghu Rai or Steve McCurry (in my case), we click whatever is clickable or even-not, and post it with a hundred non-imaginable and difficult to comprehend hashtags. And, yes, I am confident that all those incomprehensible hashtags are the creation of my kind (singles that is) because, hashtags are all we can think of as we don't need to dabble with dippers, dinners and dishes!

We have an off-and-on relationship with Tinder - We secretly hate it. It just reminds us of the Yahoo! Messenger days. Seriously, it takes immense self-control not to type ASL the moment you 'match' with someone. On bad days, Tinder is our best friend, and with determined zeal we log on to it to find someone out there (nearby, of course), and end up just swiping left, left and left. And, at a moment when you were getting bored out, you burst out laughing when you find someone like the guy below, and remind yourself, it is after all worthwhile to be on this app, just for the heck of it :D





Sunday, April 30, 2017

Zikr

Kuch dhundlayi hui si yaadoo mein kuch khojne ki koshish, har baar us ek modh par le ati hain jiska zikr na tum karna cahate ho na mein. Phir kyu, roz hum yeh socchte hain, ki kuch toh hain, un dhundlayi hui si yaadoo mein...

Aur kabhi yuin hi, bina daastak diye, har us baat ka zikr ho jata hai jinhe humne ek bare se sandook mein samet ke rakha hai, jiski chabbi ek muddaat hue kho gayi hain...

Jaab woh band pitara khulta hai, kisi zikr pe hum hustein hain, kisi pe chuppi sadh lete hain, lekin woh ek zikr na tum karte ho na mein, jo hain kahi dabi hui un dhundlayi hui si yaadoo mein...


Saturday, April 29, 2017

Yesterday

It is the day that is gone by. The day we cannot do anything about. It has become a part of our memory, irrespective of being good or bad. Then why do we lament about it? Because we hold on to it with our dear life, we get attached to that memory and if it is bad, we keep trying to analyse how we could have turned it into a more positive one. That, doesn't work. Our job is to learn from our mistakes and move on, not analyse and keep over-thinking about it.

Yesterday is the day that will never come back, and it never should. Whatever is in the past, let it remain there. The past could be our podium to grow from, but never an anchor that should drag us down.

Learn to release your past and live in the present moment.

I wrote this a few years ago, but it still holds true:

Jo beet gaya wo kal ka sach tha
Jo ayega wo kal ka sach hoga
In do kal ke beech mein
Ek aaj ka sach hai
Wahi jeena hai
Wahi sach hai...


Friday, April 28, 2017

X-factor

Women by default are endowed with X-factor, they are born with two X chromosomes after all! While men need to really work it out, they have to get the Y or as they constantly ask (the Why) out of their system to finally attain the X-factor.

So, what is this X-factor, that has made Axe cash-rich by selling some elusive dreams?

From a woman's perspective, it is really not a wowsome physique or drop-dead good looks or someone drenched in the 'scent of Arabia'. It is more to do with the intrinsic personality of an individual. That one factor which makes an individual unique from the rest of the crowd. And it could be anything, it could be as simple as a smile to as heavy-duty as compassion for everyone. It is that one characteristic that defines a person.

You see, X-factor has nothing to do with your outer appearance. It is all about who you truly are. Be you, that's your X-factor.


Thursday, April 27, 2017

Why I love Superman

I always had a special attraction for Superman, he has always been my favourite superhero, even with his ridiculous costume and equally funny hairstyle (Though the modern version got an almost 'better' upgrade). I never understood why it was Superman that I loved so much, instead of the other superheroes. I even had his stickers pasted all over my Walkman. 

And then, years later I heard of the following lines from Kill Bill: "Now, a staple of the superhero mythology is, there's the superhero and there's the alter ego. Batman is actually Bruce Wayne, Spider-Man is actually Peter Parker. When that character wakes up in the morning, he's Peter Parker. He has to put on a costume to become Spider-Man. And it is in that characteristic Superman stands alone. Superman didn't become Superman. Superman was born Superman. When Superman wakes up in the morning, he's Superman. His alter ego is Clark Kent. His outfit with the big red "S", that's the blanket he was wrapped in as a baby when the Kents found him. Those are his clothes. What Kent wears - the glasses, the business suit - that's the costume. That's the costume Superman wears to blend in with us. Clark Kent is how Superman views us. And what are the characteristics of Clark Kent. He's weak... he's unsure of himself... he's a coward. Clark Kent is Superman's critique on the whole human race."

And I instantly knew why I always loved Superman. Because he has inherently always been Superman and only put up a face for the world, to hide his real identity. Superman is a strong character, full of idealistic views, he is a saviour, a crusader against the evil, but it was not something he developed unlike others, instead, he was born with it. He was the first man ever to make me believe that it is worth to fight for your beliefs, but he was also the first man to make me realise that it is quite lonely out there. Yes, Kent got Lane in the end, but the question is was she ever really able to understand him, his loneliness?

The point is, I am no Superman, but who says you need to be Superman to believe. Do what you want to, even if it means getting hurt, fighting with people, being lonely or often being sad or depressed. Be your own Superman.


Wednesday, April 26, 2017

Voice

I had lost my voice
In the din of crowd
Among those people
Who lusted for power
They wounded me badly
Scalded my flesh
With hot iron rods
Of crude words and phrase.

I endured them still
Waiting it to end one day
The day their soul
Will call for peace
But noise is all
That they knew
Used it in force
To drown my voice.

They shouted
And shouted
The tempo was up
I have had enough
And told them to
Shut up
Now I know a peace so rare
It ties my heart to the sky up there.


Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Undo the ego, dissolve it

It might seem the most difficult thing to do. But when you dissolve your ego, a sense of calm envelopes you, and you feel at peace like never before. The ‘I’ evaporates and your entire being is in sync with the energy of the universe.

But, as exhilarating as it may sound, it is not easy to perpetually live without the shroud of ego. The moment you feel liberated, the ego starts the dance of celebration and you are again entangled into the same cycle. However, you can break this cycle, the answer is simple – Just live in the Now!

Ego is fed by our desires, expectations, personalities, and even by the seemingly positive traits like self-righteousness, charity, helpfulness. It boosts our ‘feel good’ DNA and our head touches the moist cloud. We feel invincible, strong and on the top of the world. And, from there our degeneration starts.

There is, however, a way to stop this. A simple solution – Being aware of yourself, about each moment of your life and living in the present moment. This helps in overcoming your ego. Actually, you don’t let ego enter, as there is no space for it when you live your life by each moment.

Many may say, ‘Better said than done’. But really, it is that simple. Once you are aware of your ego and know it is not doing you any good, you would want to forsake it, discard it. And that moment of awareness would set you free. And, exactly in that moment too, you would know how to live in the ‘Now’!